i'm not perfect or invincible

So, I was reminded that I have not written in quite some time, so I thought I would write something up.

Life right now is just fairly average. Not bad, not exceptional...but I'm alright with it. I'm making an effort to not become complacent, and to challenge myself daily. Lately I've just been realizing how self-absorbed I can be. I'm trying to make sure I start to ask other people what is going on in THEIR lives and listen to them instead of always talking about myself or whining or complaining about my own things. I have to walk into work and be like "its all about THEM today" and get myself in a zone. Its still the beginning of seeing how all this will pan out, but we will see how it all turns out. :]

My current stresser would be my job. I'm debating whether I want to quit working at Brio and just work exclusively at Borders.
Pros of leaving Brio:
I wouldnt have to work a double every Saturday
I wouldn't have to ask off two places
I wouldn't have to deal with aggravating managers all the time
I would have more time, bc I'm already at school 19hours a week

Cons of leaving Brio:
I make a dollar more per hour at Brio, and there is no guarantee I'd end up getting more hours at Borders if I left
I wouldn't get a check every Friday
I'm slightly nervous about how stable my job at Borders is

About that last point...let me explain. one of my friends at Borders recently lost his job because he made himself a drink in the cafe. They caught him on camera, and it is considered stealing because he used syrups and sauces and expresso and stuff. I have never full out made myself a drink, but pretty much everyone in the cafe has done stuff that is technically against the rules that we havent really thought much about... like if there is extra javakula left in the mixer after a drink we'll pour a little in a sample cup and taste it...if there is extra chai steamed up...we'd taste it....and if there was extra steamed milk we would put a little syrup in it and mix it up and make ourselves little mini steamers. I don't know how serious they take things like that. I don't want to lose my job over that! either way...I'm not going to do it anymore. I just hope they don't go and review all the previous tapes.

Oh well, either way I'm shaping up my act.

I had my first super intimidating presentation today! haha It went fairly well other than my mouth spazzing out on me leaving me with jumbled words in the shape of a sentence. oh well it happens, i know im not perfect or invincible haha.

right now im working on a trip mix for my trip to oklahoma in a week or so.
I'm pretty excited, not going to lie. :]

all for now,
rachel

looking bright

I love having something to be excited about. I think I can actually function as a complete and fulfilled human being if I 1)Have a goal 2)Have something to be excited about.
I'm looking forward to my DTS and my future, and whatever God has in store for me. I just feel like everything is so attainable. Like all my dreams aren't so impossible. It even seems like my dreams have even narrowed down and gotten more specific. I'm 19, and I am just ready to explode! I'm so ready to just GO.
I've got a DTS planned for September and then who knows?
I'm just so sick of this whole "waiting for my life to begin" stage...going to school and staying home. I just want to break out and start things up!

I had lunch with Jamie last week and she put some ideas in my head that I have not been able to stop thinking about. I'm getting fired up! ahh it could all just be so perfect. :]

It's so awesome too. Like I 100% don't want a relationship right now. Right now the only thing a relationship ship could do is hold me back. It has been cool to realize that and walk in it. I'm just focused on my future right now and it is looking bright, let me tell you :]

-Rachel