Sunday, January 10, 2010

a year of surrender

So Today we are starting a 21 Day fast at the Harvest, and I am feeling pretty serious about it. Usually I kinda ignore these church wide things without really participating, but I felt like it was about time I start acting as a member in the church. I am so excited to see breakthrough in my life. I'm looking forward to God just pouring out his wisdom and provision on me.

So here is the plan.
-I'm giving up Facebook for 3 weeks
-I'm giving up coffee for 3 weeks
-I'm fasting from food entirely on Wednesdays
-I'll give something different up for each week too. This week I'm fasting from TV.

I've been so tempted to just give up everything...whatever it takes. But I know its not about the actual act of giving something up, its about refocusing on God and listening to his voice. So instead of Facebook being my homepage, I made it my blog. Because I enjoy writing, and i want to record what God is showing me. I could do this in a journal or a Word document or something, but I don't know. I'm putting it here.
This is my journal more or less. I don't like writing things down by hand because my hand gets tired and I summarize things to get done with it.

So far let me tell you what God has said to me for 2010.
-He told me this year is a year of surrender. Where I need to let go of the things I've held onto dearest. My plans, my time, my relationships. I need to let go, and allow him to move me.
-He told me to find my sources of pride and get my priorities in line. In Isaiah 43 it says "For your sake, I will send to Babylon and take down as fugitives all the Babylonians in the ships in which they took pride." It reminded me that 1) The things which I take pride in can be used for my downfall and 2) Like Pastor Steve said when he talked about the story of Jehosaphat when the enemy was confused and destroyed itself, my enemy will be his own downfall. This time of praying and fasting will definitely be a time for me to identify those things and give them over to God.
-He told me that I am far too passive about sharing my faith. I need to be so much more vocal. The Holy Spirit will work for itself. It doesn't need my words or my actions to get the point across. Meaning, I need to stop being so scared that I'll say the wrong thing and people will be turned off to Christ. I need to walk and talk in faith and allow the Spirit to do it's work. The power of Christ is compelling itself, and I need to be that much more bold about sharing it.
-I need to live consistently. I need accountability. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and own up to my own actions without excuses. I need to make more time for God and stop giving myself a pat on the back for any semi-Christ-like thing I do. (That was a hard word to hear)

I'll be updating this as I go, but if you read this...just pray that God works through this time of praying and fasting and that I will use this time effectively and really give God my best.

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